Paul Ryan x Mitt Romney Fanfiction

mutualismkills:

Mitt Romney is a duplicitous scumbag. Whether Democrat or Republican, American or not American, EVERYONE despises Mitt Romney. This is well documented. 

Paul Ryan is a douchey frat-boy who obsesses about his abs and spends a lot of time doing something called ‘Insanity.’ He denies his wife sex and then jerks off to Internet porn after she’s gone

 to bed. He’s mean to babies. Also, he hates old people and women.

Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan are both stupid, stupid fools. I know this, because Mitt Romney was stupid enough to ask Paul Ryan to be his running mate. And Paul Ryan was stupid enough to accept. 

The LORD proclaims! Paul Ryan will go down in history as a VP nominee. He’ll also have to continue to be Paul Ryan. SMITE! 

While speaking to a group of construction workers next week, I shall cause Mitt Romney to pee his pants. He will scuttle offstage in embarrassment. SMITE! 

Romney / Ryan will lose the election and they’ll be super humiliated. 

-God 

(Source: foucaultofyou)